It rains outside though inside, there is
water shortage. The tap merely produces a few drops of water. This is
irritating and oddly enough brings about the feeling of helplessness.
It is also funny
that the introduction above apart from the feeling of helplessness has nothing
to do with what I have planned to write. Whether I am able to write about what
I came to write about or not, we shall come to know...
The norm is
during the weekdays I travel by motorcycle and during the weekends due to
different circumstances puts me in a situation where I have to use the car. My
purpose of saying this is to somewhat send out a not so subtle message
indicating that I know what it is to be a motorcyclist and what it feels like
to be a motorist, as in a car driver in case you feel lost or my choice of word
fails to send out the right message as intended by yours truly.
In a more
imaginative/immature view, if I could fly I wouldn’t use vehicles or even go
close to roads covered by tar, no matter how fresh they’re. I have nothing
against roads on the other hand road users make me want to denounce my being a
human. If I were to choose to be a being that is not a human being…when I think
about all the choices I have—I guess I am left with angel? Right now there are
only a few ‘beings’ that comes to mind; animals, devil/s or angels.
On a more
paranoid/realistic approach, every time I am on my motorbike I can’t help but
think of the possibility of getting into some sort of ‘mishap’. In a nutshell I
can’t help but blame car drivers. Simply because when I am on my bike I have
this feeling that these car drivers are intentionally or mockingly trying to
hit motorcyclists; maybe as a sign of letting off steam or showing off their
precedence?
Words can’t
express how much contempt (did I say contempt? I meant how much concern) I have
against the selfishness and the self absorb-ness that is synonym to today’s
people. Their main motto probably being, ‘no matter who I hurt, no matter what
I have to do, as long as I made it others can go to hell’. This is what I think
goes through the mind of today’s people… on second thoughts; imagine if this is
the creed people hold onto?! Let us observe and interact with people or perhaps
even have a conversation with yourself in front of the mirror? :p
On a broader
scale, my fear of being on the road consequently makes men uncomfortable
knowing that I am surrounded by people whose characteristic or even default
personality being, ‘selfishness’. I am
no-where indicating that I am a selfless person or that people should be
selfless saints or anything even close to that. I wouldn’t even dream of such a
thing judging from the level of selflessness/compassion left in today’s human
beings. I am just hoping that people won’t try to hit you when cross the road,
or when you are on your motorbike and you’ve signaled and as you try to move
your bike to one side you’d hope that the car behind you would not try to hit
you. I am not even saying that if a blind person were to cross a road someone
should take his hand and bring him to the other side of the road, I am just
saying that when a blind person tries to cross the road, one wouldn’t try to
run over him. The state of self-importance and selfishness sometimes makes me
entertain the thought of living in a faraway land devoid of people. Though the
thought amounts to nothing more than your average ‘day-dreaming’.
To me, the
society is flawed; from the way it perceives success to how it sees what is
socially acceptable. The society changes human beings into lesser human beings
by failing in its ideology, ways and methods and in matters such as banking and
education system, Perhaps the government should take some blame? Maybe diseases
like greed and love of power are the result of what has befell the people.
When you think
of happiness what do you think of? Your version of happiness of is an
accumulated knowledge derived from? Storybooks? Parents? Movies? Mtv?
Magazines?
Has anyone heard
of John Nash? (The guy from ‘A beautiful mind’) who was depicted as an amazing
person in the movie? He came up with this theory called the, ‘F**k you buddy’
theory. It is an ideology that depicts that all forms of human reaction and
human behavior are hostile towards each other and that all people constantly
study, observe and watch other people so that they can act on their
self-interest and manipulate them. He believed that humans were mainly driven
by selfishness and self-interest.
The theory goes on, if everyone behaves
selfishly and thinks solely for his own good then it might create stability,
equilibrium. According to John Nash, the rational choice is always to betray
the other person as to having no risk of failure. I hope you’re with me. In
nash’s view whenever you trust someone you face the risk of losing something
but if you betray that person then you might lost nothing. In short, everyone
should be suspicious and distrustful of everyone and everything.
Having said
that, people might have forgotten that John himself was a paranoia
schizophrenic. His words, “You don’t want to admit that you’re crazy. You see
other people as crazy but you like to think of yourself as not crazy..”
The reason I
brought this theory up was in the midst of my being a pessimist I wanted to say
that, if this theory were to put into test today…will it have worked as he had
hoped? Oh! I forgot to mention that there was a study conducted to observe the
pattern and to see the effectiveness of the theory when it was introduced; it
failed drastically. Instead of betraying each other people trusted each other.
One can only wonder if the same result will come into play in the present,
exponentially/increasingly selfish world.
THE NEXT DAY
The next day, I
was in the backseat of a car, on the way to a funeral with an uncle (as in an
old guy) and someone I consider more knowledgeable than I am (yes I do that
these days). During our drive, they were both coincidently conversing on how
people/ strangers behaving kindly and selflessly. Having heard of their stories
I knew that I couldn’t finish this piece negatively. After all, that’ll be
unfair.
Moving on, could
it be that people are prone to behave more selfishly in the cities? You know
fast paced, ‘dog eat dog world’, traffic jamms, fast food chains (I just wanted
to include fast food chains too) and etc. There was a study conducted in the US
(because when I say US you might think of it as more believable) whereby it
stated that the middle class people are more prone to behave like douche-bags
and selfishly.
Numerous times I had the ‘luck’ to view their
smugness. Even the expressions that their faces make have the ability to ruin
someone’s day. Why do I have this feeling as if I am drifting off from topic?
In the city, especially
on the road, all you see is smug faces. People drive huge cars that assert successfulness
but their behavior and expressions convey differently. One would think being
successful would automatically mean being in a state of calmness or something
to that affect? Or are we so backwards that being nice today is the quality of the
inferior and ‘unsuccessful’?
Could
successfulness mean being dominant over others or having the privilege to treat
others badly and not feel badly about it? Like what the English did and what
the west is doing and what I hope we are not following…although it seems like
we are emulating them in every way.
Back to people
especially in their ‘armored’ cars, how are these people always on the edge,
like moving pressure cookers? And when you unintentionally look at their faces,
it causes the stomach to churn. All you witness is a prick in a posh car. This
was taken from a movie, ‘What is the difference between a porcupine and a car?
With the car the pricks are inside.’ One
should also ponder on how/who defines success and how do you define success? I
guess this comes back to beliefs and how strong your beliefs are.
This superiority
complex derived from the version of success in the material world; have brought
into live some diseases…Who coined the term, ‘slum’, ‘pariah’? I would probably
say this mentality of degrading others has been on earth since well… long
before I was born.
In my effort to
treat everyone as equally as possible (because I too am tarnished by this
disease of judging a person based on their outer appearance) I will try harder
not to judge a person by their race, skin color or their wealth. A decent
person is a decent person regardless of his stature.
THE NEXT DAY
The next day, I
was driving and minutes away from reaching home. I had to pass through one last
hurdle, a troublesome roundabout. There is a roundabout in SS15 where Cars
moved as if they are bumper cars and all they wanted to do is hit you. This is
not a myth just highly exaggerated. Again, I am not saying I am a good driver,
I am saying that I am not a complete douche every time I am behind the wheel
and most of the time I try to adhere to the law. I also learned that there is
no use in getting upset or angry because getting upset over such people erm
only makes you upset.
This also
reminded me and made me realized that motorists aren’t just insensitive towards
motorcyclist they are equally insensitive to all road users even pedestrians.
Just that when you are on a motorbike the tendency for you dying seems loftier.
Can you then blame me for being concerned or slightly paranoid?
Anyways I am
going to finish this.
What I intend to
do and hope to become…I have lived and observed. The people especially the
adults have showed me that their ways are blemished. History has depicted all
kinds of life stories. It is up to me to choose a story or a chapter from
history I deem is best for me. Having said that, in reference to this
particular piece I plan not to get offended by selfish people; although I have the
tendency to get offended of a 5 year old girl. I don’t know if that made sense.
There is this
belief where when people behave badly to you, you respond to them with kindness
and wisdom. I guess it depends on the situation too? However my point being, I
normally respond to such people with well let’s just say I have somewhat
embraced the philosophy, ‘an eye for an eye.’ I realize that this is going to
be extremely difficult but I am now trying to respond differently hence you
should wish me luck. Although I have no confidence in myself regarding how I am
going to change the way I respond, there shouldn’t be anything wrong in being
hopeful, right?
