Understanding an Understatement

As the sun fades, I hoped for the heat to give way, better still go away, yet it remained still, I give into sweet cold drinks, they provide the shortest amount of relief, immediately I was angered with this ill fate, like what life has taught, accept and take it in, withstand the pain for your solution lingers in disdain.

After some minutes the heat didn’t seem to be steadfast in torture, I was surprised as to how strongly and committed I felt about my feelings in regards to the heat and now that the heat wasn’t to be felt as much. I was relieved and I began to even feel sleepy. At the same time I was troubled as to how I felt so strongly as if nothing else mattered but the agitating heat I felt—contributed by the surrounding or the weather. Perhaps I should’ve just took a more nonchalant attitude and not be bothered so much. Why was I so bothered when if I wasn’t bothered it wouldn’t have been so bothersome and now I am angry at myself and that is bothersome.

The uncertainty of what tomorrow brings and the threat that it might bring about idleness that brings about darkness and causes the brain to come to a halt and drowns one back into abyss of negativity is surely burdensome to the mind and keeps it busy with a pungent scent of paranoia.

‘The ice cream looks good, but it also causes weight gain.’ This is my thought when I am standing in front of an ice cream box.   

I also worry about the well being of my plants and trees. Not that I care for them too much, I wish to see them blossom healthily with bright leaves and bear sweet flowers and fruits. I don’t know if I am just being selfish.

The darkness of night always majestically taunting, the darkness of night always mesmerizing, the darkness is feared because so little is to be known of it, darkness is revered for the comfort it brings. So little is known of it, what can I expect to know from a black space, just when I close my eyes all that I could see is a black wide space. Though when it is closed the mind then plays this game of confusing one and tricking one into dreams that once again appears significant and realistic, as if it matters. In the end I open my eyes due to the sound of the clock only to realize the life I was so passionate about was nothing but a specter of a dream. This life too will end with me opening my eyes to the light.

I can once again feel the heat returning, the music as soothing as it sounds is not helping, my face appears to be frowning. I don’t know if I can take this feeling nonchalantly.

When my memories go back to the time I was shaped, when my memories go back to when I was a kid, I notice how it was molded and shaped. It was inevitable this fate, though all my thoughts could muster up is unfortunate.

I keep on fretting yet I know I could know of nothing, I keep on worrying, though it might seem like it amounts to nothing, yet worrying keep things flowing. Most of the time it’s just trying and tiring.

It is getting too heated, my body seems like it’s being mistreated, the soul feels like it’s being violated,  it feels like being boiled on the stove where the fire is at its slowest. *goes to shower* Now that I am back from the shower, I feel so much at ease, I feel sleepy once again.

I am the only person who understands myself, yet I understand myself so poorly.

The Intellect

“He who does not worship God worships himself through the capability of his intellect to what its exposed to; he remains in the dark/ignorant to what he does not know or comprehend and arrogant to everyone else, such is the intellect.”

p.s. I don't remember where I got this from. I wrote this down in my book a long time back and found it again today. I don't think I am capable of coming up with this level of phrases hence I must've gotten it from a book. I like it because it makes a lot of sense to me.

Humming the Hums of Humility & of Inequity

Glimpses of heavenly abode appears welcoming ahead

The back of his head being punctured by the swollen nodes

The only choice left is to embrace and withstand the painful nodes.

The couple stared ahead trying to speculate what endeavors they might have to face…

Trying to gain strength as they hope optimistically

Their eyes swimming the vastly sea

The tiny grains of sand that makes the beach

The bubbles that are found on the shores at the beaches

The vastness of what lies in between, ahead, before and after

Of what is more and beyond one’s reaches

Reminds one of the amount of knowledge in one’s possessesion

Making one shudder at the knowledge that is remoteness

He keeps on saying, ‘Our intelligence is very-very limited!’

He then added, ‘even our senses, they lie to us!’

‘Yet, we are so self assured of our intelligence and our senses.’

Surely we have reached a consensus?

He feels his spirit shrinking into depletion

Weak, numb and dumb, always on the edge

Afraid as he is weak,

Agitated as he is conscious of his intelligence

Shallow as he is constantly threatened by challenges

Calmness why not come pay a visit?

The world is certainly small in comparison to the universe

If we were to conduct a comparison sort of an experiment

Of how minute we are

Don’t go there, it makes the mind bleed

When one heeds of how truly tiny he is

The shallow people are overwhelmed with greed

He is greedy for wisdom

But poor is his kingdom

Overcome by boredom

Time is wasted on empty notions

This reminds him of the many nations

Those who are in power

Wicked and evil, condescending towards the nations and its people

Then this naturally gives birth to variances

Where then bloodshed becomes common

No matter how sad and indignant

To be grateful and thankful must become prominent

For we are ever unaware of when our little haven of abode will give welcome to destruction

And the fire of destruction will wipe away both our dreams and afflictions

Our entire existence then comes to a standstill

It is time for retribution, one that corresponds to our deeds and actions

Requiem for A Brim

The world so pretty

The creatures so busy

No time for worry

The banks are in a hurry

Through the drains and the rivers,

Alas, they have corrupted the seas

Greed even affects the mountains and greeneries

Giving mountains destructed bit by bit to erect buildings and wealth of the so called ‘elites’

Such is the state and such is the earth and such are people

Endangered are values

Almost in extinction are thoughtfulness and simplicity

Let us all just go to sleep

Who knows in our dreams there will be some peace

Let us all just go to sleep

Who knows by the time we wake up the air would be cleaner and devoid of selfishness

Let us all just remain sleeping

By the time we wake up, it would already be the time of reckoning

Open your eyes before your heart stop beating

Sunday Mourning

The heart that weeps

Able to relate to the sound of despair

Listening to the tune that resonates a sordid pain

A tale of struggle that lacks progress

A surreal expression

A story of bleak depictions

Beautifully told,

One similar soul relates to another

Seeking comfort in one's suffering

A gentle story with a grotesque narrator

A plot that brings about cringes

Yet at the same time,

Strangely it soothes

A bond is created

A deep sense of pain beautifully depicted

An understading created

The complexity of the heart deciphered

Understanding sadness emanates happiness

Wildfire

There is a wildfire, it has now made the street dustier and smokier, yet they keep on burning the forest without a second thought, there is a wildfire, it causes my nose to cry and dry and when there is no moisture, there is a feeling of hurt when the process of inhale and exhale takes place, as I continue to inhale and exhale in discomfort, it’s as if as long as the discomfort was felt it was cursing the people who were reaping the benefits out of this wildfire.  There is a wildfire, the haze as an affect causes a splendid terror; my eyes burns, bleeds tears of helplessness and anger. Which wealthy person’s pockets are being filled with euro dollars?! What a challenge and a test it is to be weak and poor, the poor chap has not known justice nor did his parents mentioned anything about justice, it was only known to him via tales that were written in books. What a challenge it is to be weak and have no control over oneself he only has the choice on how to accept the consequences. What a challenge it is to be weak, when someone else gets to determine the condition and the weather. Such is the state of the world. There is a wildfire, we live in a country which is rich in nature, yet as rich as it is, it is nevertheless limited not limitless! It will soon be depleted, yet these crazy people crazed with power they keep on cutting our resources, what will happen to the clean air and clean water, live stocks and vegetation? Don’t they know that neither currency nor gold can buy air and water? Can their money cause trees to grow or flowers to bloom? Obviously they do but what they care for is the wildfire, one that resides within their hearts, one that causes them to stir and deter others.  There is a wildfire; artificial rain can’t seem to stop the vengeful wildfire. There is a wildfire, one that is made of anger, one that hopes for change and just rulers. There is a wildfire, one that consists of calm in the realms of terror. There is a wildfire, one that stands firm and is filled with love that has overcome all barriers.

Rantrantrant

I have this habit of inappropriately getting sick during festive seasons. I am now recovering from a fever which has lasted for two week, give or take. It wasn’t fun to say the least. However judging from my sickness which lasted for quite a long period, I feel so much more overjoyed! and so much more grateful for being healthy again albeit not a 100%. I was back at work last week and that too wasn’t fun because I was as you would’ve guessed, not feeling well. Another thing I’ve learnt was the deed one does in routine/everyday somewhat halts/comes to a stop when one is stricken by (in my case) sickness.

Which reminded me of this quote, "Take advantage of five matters before five matters:  youth, before old age; health, before sickness; wealth before poverty; your free time before you become busy; and life, before death."   This quote makes so much more sense now. Let’s just hope it stays longer in memory.

Being absent minded and taking things too easily can be life risking. Yesterday, I said to myself that I’d be useful and get some things done. With that in mind, I started cleaning my aquariums and pond. There was one particular aquarium that stood out because it was literally yellow in colour. I drained the water out, cleaned the filter and everything in it and started filling it with water. Only that I forgot to fill the aquarium with aquarium salt/ liquid C02. To put it short my negligence had led to the death of several fishes. Out of guilt and exhaustion, I was considering a different hobby.

I thought I got thinner, today whilst I was putting on my pants I was greeted by a surprise I wasn’t as thin as I thought I’d be.  It’s funny while you’re fasting the thought of eating doesn’t cross the  mind but when you’re not every idle moment wishes to be filled by chewing something or drinking something nice and sweet and cold. Alas, the desires of mankind.

Recently, I was fortunate enough to purchase a new cpu, it has now made life so much easier and convenient. Only bad thing is, I spent way too much time now watching animes and other entertainment shows. This in turn prevents me from doing more necessary and important stuffs like studying and house chores.

Lastly, I’d like to wish everyone a Happy Eid. Plant more trees, please.

Of explanation/s

Judging from my previous entries, one might think that your humble writer might be hating on the rich. Truth be said, neither does he hate rich people nor does he dislike wealth (duh!). Many of my friends too are people who are well off. Also. I’ve recently have with my own eyes come to know many generous rich old chaps who assist and help organizations and needy people. A respected scholar I know said, “We compliment each other, the rich needs the religious and the religious needs the rich.” He also added that it is always better to give people the benefit of the doubt. Still, whenever I think of the oil rich Arab countries and compare them to African countries or other Asian countries. It just makes one go, “Hope for humanity…*Poof*”

Having said that let me explain myself; what I have a deep dislike for is the arrogance, the misuse of power, the special treatment, the disparity, unfairness, capitalization and the list just goes on. Still, if only the poor stop betraying the poor and stop preferring the rich to their own kind, things would be so much better. It is also the delusion of the poor who thinks by helping the rich, he too might get wealthier hence he betrays his own kind. Alas we are often cursed with a hollow mindset. Again, I don’t dislike money, I dislike the effect money brings to people. It changes them into monsters. Let us hope and pray that we don’t swerve and turn our backs from humanity and from being human and humane if were to ever obtain wealth.

Recently From an entry of mine, I’ve been getting some feedbacks that made certain individuals think that I am against earning a living or something (Yes, there are humans who read my work). To that I say, I waste too much money on things I don’t really need hence that makes me ‘pro-living’?

Finally, amongst the the things I wholeheartedly despise, is the demented delusion people have or are programmed to believe that wealth = happiness. To that I say, well I don't want to say anything because what I say has no substance neither weight. Let's look at the bright side and hope we all become brighter both outwardly and inwardly.

p.s. This is a good clip to watch:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=crLeD6RdhBQ 

Richer, please...

Isn't it pretty simple? It’s not impossible to comprehend, it is actually pretty obvious, no? Let us just ponder for a second; bear with me, don’t be biased yet, just let your thoughts flow a little deeper. Forget about society and its mandates. Think about it, the richer an individual is the more selfish and careless he is about others?

 Why do we look up to such people, worst still why do we aspire to be like them? Let us look at the present and let us also look at the pages of history; these people we look-up at and aspire to become are known for their arrogance and evil deeds. Still we think this is success and this is happiness.

If it really means that, then why are the rich after achieving all the riches in the world, still not happy? Worse still they become greedier, evil-er and more arrogant and inhumane towards others? Yet, still I have the desire to gain more…such is the weak, easily swayed human man.

There is something very wrong with us, with our society and with the world; that we aspire to become the worst kind of people in existence...We aspire to become the likes of Pharaohs.

Ialmost forgot, this was one of the main contributing factors of this spontaneous/unplanned entry. Do watch it and perhaps you too will be enraged and then saddened and after that feel utterly hopeless...

  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=egtKx24dat8

Young Man

Time and time again

Like the needles on a clock

Almost like a mechanical device

We walk by life

We continue to age whilst in a daze

Feelings of numbness clench the senses

 Life in the past,

 No matter how wounded and battered the memories

Is now history only the pain of it subsists,

They then in some cases change your individuality,

You’re not who you used to be

The stage that we withstood

The stage we misunderstood

In the cage where we came of age

Still we remain in continuous daze

A chase for happiness that leads only to loneliness

We gaze and captured the beauties in life,

Though it gave us some happiness,

The feeling of that joy eventually fades…

Who knew one would mature and come of age

He ages in stages, physically he changes

His hair are white, knees are weak,

Yet mentally and spiritually he speaks,

The language of adolescent kids

Unlike his physical growth, spiritually he depletes

He remains with the same dreams that he dreamt of when we was in his teens

Stuck in a trap and perpetually sinking, like in a quicksand, he is steadily pulled in

Now old, he thinks he has conquered wisdom

Possessor of knowledge and a ruler of kingdoms

Though when he is alone by himself

A realization comes to mind

It says, “All the time you’ve spent,

What has it yield?”

In spite of all this he continues to waste his time

He regrets for not doing more

Yet he persist in misusing his time

The world, a temporal stage

So real, so surreal,

Seemingly eternal, obviously temporal

As he grows in age, death too draws closer

Health seem more obscure

Time seems more difficult to procure

Desires and gaining honour seems like the only doors

All these things he bought and got bored

Bought and got bored

Now that he’s old,

He thinks of how he should’ve ploughed his life

In a more meaningful manner

As to remain calm and with peacefulness in all matters

Though he is full off regrets

Hope yet remains there

Sadly old habits too remain

A young man today,

Old tomorrow

Drebar Selfish

Malayan drivers, mostly comprises of two kinds—one is either too careful or too relaxed the other is too rash or too rushed. Both of them have one thing in common. Both are selfish in their own ways and selfishness causes only negativity and dreadfulness.

 Shallowness is noticeable when we keep on changing lanes when we all are heading towards the same direction. Instead we need to constantly feel like we are moving even it means merely zigzagging. We end up slowing down the traffic flow. I am not just blaming others, I am one of you and that puts my mind and heart under severe distressfulness. Though seriously, what is with this selfish mentality, whereby others don’t matter, “as long as I am fine the rest don’t matter.” Which parents thought their kids this form of belief?! Which school refrains one to look ahead and train them to remain shallow and all that they can see and think off is only their own self-importance?! I am not sure whether the previous sentences were questions or statements?

Having said that, of course we need someone to blame, hence I’d generalize and blame the society, although I don’t think anyone deserves more  blaming than our society, except the ones who might’ve shaped the society itself. It pains me when I see the huge roads being clogged at dawn. These expectations and desires that make people sell their lives and live in lifelong debts... Again, it feels like my skin being peeled, (that’s a little too dramatic, sorry about that) to once again have this connection with the masses of people, that I too am with the burden of having to pay off monthly debts for years to come. In order to do so, a job has to always be secured and in order to have a secure job; one has to serve his master and company day in and day out. Such is the cycle.

Nevertheless, having being all pessimistic. It is of importance and greatness for a human being to behave in a selfless way, you know because we live in a selfish community that moulds people into becoming self-interested beings. Again to make life balanced and not only try to enrich oneself the selfish way i.e. the material way, one will surely be happier. Though we don’t see it because we are shallow beings, we can’t afford to look forward. There are walls surrounding us, making us only see a few steps ahead.

Now that I am done whining, I’ll probably go look for something else to shop/buy to fulfil my insatiable desires which would probably satisfy me for a day or two or few mere minutes until I figure out what other things to buy to make life seem more meaningful, such is the fool.

I close with a verse from the scripture:

And they say, “Our hearts are covered against the affair you call us to, and there is deafness in our ears, and there is a barrier between us and you - therefore mind your own business, we are minding ours.”

Some

Nah, not so many changes, personalities and characters will they ever change? Maybe a little though the main traits, they still persist and endure. It has been a while and there was so many things going through my mind, so many things I wanted to put in writing that made the feeling of self-importance enter the mind hence again and again I lost interest.  Though seeing that I am transforming petty thoughts into words, I’ve succumbed.

I feel like posting up pictures of plants and other greens that dwells around my house. I lost my camera though; I misplaced it I don’t know where. I have another camera but the charger for that camera is also nowhere to be found.

You know when you decide on something you want to do rather passionately and follow through your interest and you end up spending your time and money and effort? Well I did that and early this morning it all paid off quite the unexpectedly. I invested in buying some pricy fishes of which I hoped they’d grow big and prosper which will then lead me into prospering. In-spite of my empty hopes they all died due to the water pump failing. It will also be helpful to bear in mind that these are sensitive fishes to begin with. Yes I am a little upset, realizing that my ‘long term’ investment perished after a couple of days, literally. As I would and almost written on the details of the terrible way that led to the expiry of my fishes and the collapse of my venture, I prefer to leave the horridness of what transpired within my now, broken heart. Having said that, I am going to save up, buy the same fishes and once again sail through and face the unpredictable ocean-s, so to speak.  

I have more orchids now. If you know about orchids (not that I do) you must’ve heard of ‘tiger orchid’ so I am hoping it would flower soon. Apart from that I have a few wild orchids (apparently they are not so easily obtained hence gives me some kind of selfish self-satisfaction that leads to me thinking of myself as a cool person).  

The cats at my house are multiplying fortunately due to some good caretakers, the house doesn’t smell of cats and to the cats’ good luck, fortunately I am not one of its caretakers.

The news, sometimes I read the news although it is designed to shove your sheep-like mind into believing what it wants you to, even then the news are dreadful and makes me lose all hope in the world (not that it matters). Hence every time I get bored I’d browse through the headlines get depressed and watch something pointless on utube.

Time. I am more and more aware of how time flies and how fast I am ageing. I never in my life imagined I would age to this age, I suppose subconsciously I believed I would just remain in my 20’s. Life is sad and a major part of life is accepting and moving on. Accept on move on whether you like it or not. What a sad thing existent is.

I’ve always love being alone with myself unperturbed. I like aloneness; though at the same time, I love company and the people around me but in the next room.   

These are just some thoughts that goes/ going through my mind. I should write more poetries, they’re more vague and at the same time pretty. Speaking of pretty, I have decided to grow my hair long once again. We’ll see how that goes and just so you know not all of my investments end up in a tragedy or with multiple deaths.  

I like waking up early in the morning although sometimes it can be quite challenging but every single time it is very satisfying. You know, due to time moving too fast and the ageing process. Waking up early makes life more meaningful and my days more meaningful too, at least that’s what I think. Here’s to hoping I wake early for the rest of my days and emphasizing more hope on sleeping early.

I think this much should suffice. Grow more plants and be less selfish and self-centred, I know they mean the same but I was trying to come up with a replacement for the word dumb.

  

This was a poem I read somewhere. I posted something similar to this before though they aren't the same..

"One day a man tempted an ignorant boy

With his money to safeguard against him

So he told him, bring me the heart of your mother boy

And to you I’ll give gold coins and pearls

So he went and sheathed a dagger with her chest

And the heart he took out and went back the way he came

Though because of his excess haste, he fell

And so the torn heart fell and rolled as he stumbled

The mother’s heart called him while being covered with dirt

Son! My beloved! Are you hurt?

And suddenly even though the voice was very compassionate

It was as if the wrath of the heavens have fallen on the boy

And he unsheathed the dagger to stab himself

A stabbing to become an example for those who heed examples

The heart of the mother called him saying, stop your hand

And do not kill my heart twice in the same place,

Stop your hand and do not kill my heart twice in the same place"

Which Friday?

It was the Friday before the last Friday or the one before it. I had postponed this entry for so long I don’t remember which Friday it was. It was a Friday though.

 The slave had to come to work early; He left home close in the wee hours of dawn. As soon as he neared the highway around 6.40am he was hit by a surge of surprise. What he saw made his insides churn a little. The highway he was on was already jammed so early in the morning. People were already rushing to work. Aslam thought to himself, “What in the worId is going on?” He said whilst feeling a little sad inside, for some reasons. The sadder part was he wasn’t exactly different than the hordes of sheep’s.  Then he said, “Well bear with me whilst my thought scatters. How much time do we spend getting to work, being at work and coming back from work? How many years of life had gone? What have we learned and gained? Look at me” he said.  “It takes me more than an hour to go to work and come back from work. I am still lucky because we get to take the company bus and you know; get to nap throughout the journey, if one chooses to do so at least. Travelling on my own to work if I were to drive it will cost more than a thousand ringgit each month.” He whispered to himself, now in the bus while some of his colleagues were on their laptops busy working.

Everyone is now travelling in one direction (not the boy band) the one that presumably promotes stability, wealth and happiness.

How much time and effort, turned into dust, we however remain aghast, what is this meekness, this sheep like adherence. Existentialism, So much power one has of himself? When the simplest act we are dependent on other things; the directions are wrong, depression has sprung, the pain it gobbles up the mind, the soul, disrupting the decision making, the shallow sheeps unable to look beyond the laws of the shallow and selfish society. Time spent in order to buy more things, to pay off debts high as kings, to show others I have a job, I go out during the day, come back looking tired at night surely that can only mean conformity and adherence to the laws stated by the society, Success!

Having said that, the thing that keeps me going or keeps me in peace despite the occasional visit by mr. Depression is a balanced life one where I try to divide wisely and concentrate on all aspects of my life especially on spirituality and not superficiality. I wake up early in the morning not thinking of worldly things and I go to sleep not thinking of  any shallow thoughts/dreams or least try. Perhaps we shall learn from history and look at the people or the civilisation before us who have passed away. What are the things that really matters? I guess I am in many ways, depends on how you look at it, fortunate in many ways therefore should constantly be reminding myself to be grateful.

I end with this verse:

 “The Reality,  What is the Reality, what will make you know what the reality is!”

    

The Promised Future

Ever since we were kids, we were told to look-out for the future. Therefore while we began schooling we were told to study for the future, while we got bad grades, they said you should work harder for the future, they then said, what do you want to do in the future? Seriously, what is all this unnecessary pressure? 

The race then commences, from getting into a good class to getting into a good college, university, field etc. All for the promise of a bright future that is capable of providing stability, recognition, a wife and a life of cherish-able future! Hence we sacrifice our time, wealth and our lives for this promised future. We ignore, mistreat and wrong others; Nay! We have no time for others! We are too concerned for our future; we forget the hands that fed us, mistreat our parents simply because they are a liability for our promised future. 

This worldly abode has changed the hearts into cold hearted creatures. Finally as we began earning on our own, we continue prying into getting a more wonderful future, it starts off with a 9 years debt for a car that shouts out, success! As if that’s not hefty enough we sign up for a 20 year old contract for a house, you know, for the future. 

We then sail down a different journey; a long journey spent paying off debts for the future. All this, whilst ignoring and destroying the bigger home, Mother Nature. We are so short sighted; we cut down the mountains and grow new houses, destroy the eco-system and buy eco-friendly air fresheners. Have we forgotten Mountains encompasses diversity of species, flora and fauna, it contains minerals, water, wood, timber and food. Mountains protect us from strong wind and are an important influence on the climate changes. Mountains also provide freshwater for more than half of humanity, and are, in effect, the water towers of the world. Mountains also stabilize the earth and prevent earthquakes.

Still we tear down mountains so that we can develop buildings for the future, for the people who are chasing their bright future, to be enslaved as they are in possession of their new houses for the future. By the time they pay off their debts by enslaving their present future, who knows what will be left of their future?

Worse still the self is ignorant of the soul and has no idea of the heart and mind; too busy fulfilling the pangs of desires. 

Worst still we have no idea over the creator, too consumed of our worldly future and our endless desires while the society continues to consume mankind’s future. 

To Err

Too focused on the outside, he overlooks the treasures inside, for it has been said whence one has accepted his state and condition, the unfair situation, the good luck and the lack of it, one gathers understanding and through that understanding a sort of wisdom. The underlying problem is we try to find blame when no one should be blamed, when everyone should be blamed, when everyone should be blaming himself instead of blaming others.

The problem is, it is difficult not to care of what other’s think especially when you were raised in a place filled with judgmental human beings. The despicable act of judging grows on you. The point being conveyed is when you stop thinking about judgmental people; you cease to be a judgemental person. Judging is a disease caught by the sick trait of the environment.

Constantly judging the self, his intention and his objectives on the other hand is a whole different dimension. When one concentrates on his every intention, he becomes aware of his mistakes and weaknesses instead of the weaknesses of others, as a consequesnt being more conscious of his being and condition. It is not easy looking at the self from the within. It is not easy to restrict desires all the time. It is not easy always studying the intention on every single thought, speech and action. Sincerity is questioning every move, speech, gesture and intention is almost extinct.

The remembrance of spiritual teachers teaching about sincerity comes to mind. They don’t only speak of it but live it. Looking at the way they live their lives and the internal strength they extant convinces one more that these are gifted beings. Sure to the kings who reign the world, they look like insignificant beggars. However the beauty of character displayed through sincerity portrays what true virtue is.

On a more random note, the part of life where a fate is decided in whichever household it is born into suffocates the mind. Though being more and more aware of one’s limited intelligence and comprehension; a realization comes to mind, it is the community, society, the people that judge, stereotype, classify, degrade and divide. On and on, generation after generation, time and time again, the tarnished system keeps consuming each man’s soul for generations and generations, time and time again, on and on.

 Men are naturally attracted to physical wealth and prowess though excessive love for it has changed and shaped the mind-set of mankind…hence as a result mankind has inherited these values and have all become trapped victims to a transgressing, selfish society.

However, the goal is to draw close to the pious and the people who have achieved sincerity, the ones blessed with wisdom.  Although the world might look at them unkindly and tauntingly, they constantly strive hard for the community, to not be neglectful to the soul. These are the very few who live with what they have and try their best to not prioritize physical wealth. Surely they deserve some respect?

After all we are just humans, weak and fallible, we live for a while and we are forgotten even before the final farewell, the once producing well is now dry and abandoned, it is better to be conscious of the self than to spend life for the recognition of human trolls. Most men are not wise they've continue to disregard the soul that lay beneath the soil. May we be granted the strength, will and the courage to stand against the tides—for the wealth of the soul is a wealth that is whole.

Today

This happens occasionally and it happened again this morning, a car from a different lane, knowing that I was on the lane still drove on and almost knocked into me. Making me swerve into a different lane, fortunately the driver on the other lane noticed and slowed down his car. The driver in his huge car acted as if nothing happened and just drove on in spite of my honking and insistent glaring. They never bother, to them here is a motorbike getting in their way.  

The key is when an individual is calmer that is, he is to understand the state of the world and where the rich step on the weak and get away with it. Anger doesn’t solve anything. The anger of a poor person only troubles himself and not others. Acknowledging the state of the world and understanding how it works will get us another day to survive. The world does not serve the poor, it oppresses them. Yea here I go again, being bitter and spiteful, you say. No I am not. I am just saying it as it is and I am not angry. I was angry that the driver didn’t care for a life and I was angry for being weak… and after realizing that there is no way for impartiality, I rode on.

If only the poor didn’t stick up for the rich and stood up more for the poor. It would’ve made at least some difference. I am grateful that I am still in one piece. I got lucky. Fellow friends, understand how the world works, accept your destiny, and most importantly work effortlessly on enhancing your spirituality; for in inner peace lies all kinds of ease and in enriching the soul one discovers the key to calmness. Let us be more accepting of who we are and pray to be people of understanding and with loads of control over our temperaments.

My teacher once told me, “Don’t fight for yourself, leave that to God. However, fight for the rights of others.”

CTea

The Chinese tea,

Given by the quiet old man,

The ignorant poured all the leaves in one mug,

Unaware of the value of the dried leaves he dropped,

The leaves obviously too much for one cup.

A little dizzy,

Not to the extent of uneasy,

No, not queasy,

I feel so friggin sleepy!

This has got to be one of my toughest entries,

Attempting to write whilst the head is being silly,

Seriously, the head is hefty with the feeling of heavy,

Was it really the tea?

Some floating hours went by,

The old man was there again,

The ignorant saw him again,

He showered his praises about the leaves he gobbled,

“Come see me tomorrow”, he said

“Bring a container with you this time”, he said

More hot Chinese tea to gulp in,

The head had mixed feeling,

Though at the same time felt, “this might be interesting.” 

Provrb

I was watching a clip and in this clip, the speaker said these words. I found it to be pretty awesome hence the posting. I hope it is as meaningful to you as it is to me.  

“The one who is always trying to discover the unknown, he could not even discover himself, he who captured the rays of the sun, yet he failed to fill the void in his life. The one who illuminated the entire world with lanterns failed to realise the darkness within his own heart, if there is darkness in one’s heart, what good is the light on the outside.” -Urdu proverb-

Significant Much

My hair, gets stressed when the air around becomes too humid. I am trying to grow my hair long again. It’s been a few months since I got a haircut though I don’t know if I’ll be able to persevere and you know have it longer. My goal is to see the outcome of my patience. I am obviously optimistic but at the same time, at the back of my head I can’t help but fear it will only be a mess. Imagine being patient for months only to be shocked by the result of my persistence and endurance. Only to be introduced to bad hair.

I woke up tired and tremendously sleepy; nonetheless I was also proud for being able to function efficiently despite the discomfort I experienced. However, as soon as I was in the bus, I got comfy and as usual planned on getting some deep/nice sleep. The driver, despite being behind schedule by being slowed down by the passengers, drove quite well probably because of the amounts of complaints his boss have been receiving.  I didn’t take the proper driving for granted. I slept through the journey for almost a full hour. I woke up satisfied and my day today seems brighter than usual.

It’s almost lunch time and as per my usual fashion, I go out and eat early. Simply because there’ll be less people and more food for the stomach to stomach. Here I am back from lunch, I sat with some students and our conversation not so surprisingly moved to girls hence I had to pass down my wisdom and gave them advises regarding girls and relationships. Of course they were bitter!

I just read an email from work stating that we have to work this weekend. No! Unlike what you’re expecting I shan’t whine and act as you’ve predicted. I am sleepy.

As usual well more than usual I’ve been buying stuffs that I don’t really need and as a consequence have been losing a lot of the money I really need. Please contact me if you feel like donating some of your money. Thanks.