Darkness, Darkness Is Spreading

Child hood friends we were. We were proud to still be friends, dear friends after all this period. Although there were many to stop us, we didn’t seem to take that as a given. We were just the few common lot that one understands the other and the need to pretend to be another was not needed.

It was difficult for us to hang as we used to, but the opportunity given would not be wasted by sitting at home surrounded by problems and problematic people. The mood was pretentious while the troubles were real. Neither of us enjoyed sticking at home with unsettled troubles burdening, when feeling helpless was the only thing that could be done. Not a good feeling, I might add.

The outings weren’t as extravagant or entertaining such as how the others ‘happenings’ would spend their times. Ours were mundane and ordinary; nonetheless it was nearly as entertaining and enjoyable knowing that not every entertainment was for everyone. We were getting old I’d say, but realizing that a peaceful untroubled outing is all that matters.

The more you know and research about the world and its people, the more chaotic you realize it is. People from before us were as complicated and troubled as we are now. I guess it all sums out by the saying, ‘life is a circle’. Well, of course if what you study or research are about evil countries, organizations and evil people. The most knowledge you gain is about their deceptions and the parts they play in turning the world to their benefits.

One would have the exact opposite knowing if he chooses to study or research about the "do gooders" and their kind I am thinking, that he would learn of how wonderful the world is and the people who inhabits it. But it normally does succumb to complications and confusions living in a time where doing good and bad come hand in hand.

I guess, what kept us together was the fact that some of us were unhappy and shared the same uneasiness or at least understands the other and also not forgetting the method of communication that doesn’t differs from others such as constant phone calls, text messages and when all fails, going to a friends place and abruptly waking their sleeping ass off was the only solution. We enjoyed it; even the person whose awakening was rather rude might have felt appreciated. Luckily enough the parents didn’t seem to make it a big issue.

I am not bragging or boasting of our friendship: it was somewhat peculiar that as people who weren’t on talking terms during the early day as we were from different groups or clans if it’s clearer to you. And becoming close friends later on was something that was not expected. I guess, I realized by that time that being at fancy places and hanging with a particular group feeling superior to the rest weren’t completely convincing. Hanging with people who constantly tried to prove that they were better than the rest of the lots was too undermining and arrogant. That was my perception then and still is.

There weren’t many of us but it often consists of nice guys who were tolerable and tolerate to each other. I was getting prepared to head home from work. It was just a normal boring day at work but since boring was always better compared to trouble, I had no complaints.
It was a wonder to know that only a few enjoyed their jobs (it could also be only my friends) but there weren’t any other way to live a normal life. I am a slave of money and the need of it controls my life. Yet, still there was always hope or in the very end, acceptance.

I heard a familiar sound coming from my phone and there was two text messages arriving almost simultaneously with almost the same message but from different people. It lighted my day, we had a plan for the night and despite the weariness I was energetic as if the day had just started. The mind plays tricks on us.

My arrival at home was normal and I somewhat felt gratified having a place to return to, in hope that I would still have a place to return to in the future. It was a scary thought: I tried not to decorate my mind with thinking of unpleasantness. There was a phone call conveying a message that I had to get ready in ten minutes time. It crushed my dream of having a brisk sleep to refrain from the weariness I felt. I got readied and after a quick shower looked outside searching for any vehicles parked outside the house. There was one and it looked rather agitated, I hurried outside and we were soon heading towards our destination but before that to another friends place. The driver was a kindhearted guy who didn’t mind the driving and the picking ups and the sending backs. I guess we all badly wanted to get off from home especially after a day worth of tiring work, with a similar way of thinking that is of rewarding thyself, not too much though, knowing limits.

It was cold outside as it was raining the car’s wipers were put on to work and was busy wiping the glass from one end to another. The sound of rain drops dropping on the roof were clear despite the noise coming out from the speakers. The road was wet hence slippery. The driver was cautioned to be careful and he abided it. Some were already sleeping in the car due to exhaustion from the day and work. The rest of us were chatting away pointlessly and would occasionally talk about useful awareness matters. But most of the time it was just the absurd jokes, sarcasm and cynical comments.

By the time we reached our destination everyone in the vehicle was awoken and was walking out of it and were told to resume their goodnight sleep in the cinema. Tickets were bought and we went on walking for a while and to the movies. It wasn’t bad neither it was good. We managed to waste a few moments with a price to pay but nonetheless, the free times , it was not spent alone.

It was already late and most of us had to wake up early in the morning, doing about the same routine and come back home exhausted. We were all seated in a friend’s vehicle and were set to go back to our living place. Everyone looked sleepy and some might even already started regretting coming along and there was a guy at the back already dozing off. The air was now quiet and the song that was aired on the radio was a tune that most of us liked and it was pleasant (it was entitled ‘I hate you then I love you’). Everything seemed perfect. The seat was cozy, the air condition was perfect, and the friends were either sleeping or their thoughts drifting somewhere only they’d know. There was complete silence for the exception of the song. I was, at the moment in the state of mind of trying to appreciate every essence and aspects of life while I could hence I was totally engulfed in my thoughts and was on the verge of sleeping.

I found myself thinking of yesterday’s night. I hung with a totally opposite crowd compared to this one and funnily enough they too were childhood and close friends.

I was picked up after work and we were off to a friend’s house nearby, it was already past midnight. The activities there too were boring but it was not bad. I remembered coming home almost at dawn thinking that I’ve spent a few hours playing a video game. I could’ve slept. The same game every time but it was always fun every single time, it was winning eleven 9. The game was so realistic that it felt almost real.

The atmosphere were cheerful and smoky, the lot had a little too many joints. And everyone was super sensitive even the ones who weren’t smoking, it could have been the effects of losing. Everyone looked worn out; after a couple more hours of playing the game and ranting pointlessly I decided that it was time to go back.

The song changed, I was aware of that but my eyes were still closed. The next song was on, I could hear my friends that were awake talking, and it was the guy from the backseat talking and the driver friend, listening to his story. He disrupted his story and started saying on how they’re going to have trouble waking up in the morning. The seat was comfortable and huge, I felt safe, I was with my close buddies, and I thought to myself that I don’t regret knowing them.

A few minutes passed, I opened my eyes to see where we at and looked at my friend who was driving and realized that he was sleeping.

I didn’t want to panic, but I was shocked. I shouted his name and shook him up as fast as I could. He opened his eyes, and took control of the vehicle. A sigh of relief I felt for a moment, but as I looked ahead there was a lorry in front and my heart stopped beating. I didn’t know about the guys at the back but flashes of thoughts passed through my head and before the next thought came across, there was the crash, a loud cracking collision.

I opened my eyes, only to hear distance footsteps walking away from me. My mind paused, so did everything else.

‘Then, what happened?’ the friend who was driving asked.

‘How, would I know, I was just telling you a story of what would happen, if you felt asleep while driving’. Reply came from the back.

It was all so confusing and chaotic. I now felt, someone pressing on to my arms and shaking me up I opened my eyes now, the friend who was driving was not driving anymore, the vehicle was stopped and I looked at him, looking at him staring at me. I looked back at him innocently and questioned him,
‘What?’
‘Get out’, was what he said and I turned around to see where I was at. I was in front of my home and was relieved to be back. I looked back in the car, twisting my back, looking for the occupants at the back, there was no one there.

I looked confused and told my friend, ‘dude you won’t believe what I dreamt about’. To my surprise he coldly said, ‘No’. I climbed down and shut the heavy door. The car drove swiftly past me.