Circle

A circle,

Resisting in circles,

To endure or to concur,

Concurring to the laws of a timid culture,

What’s with this social order?

Creating so much duress

Ensuring everyone is stressed.

Who’s conquest?

What quest?

This test,

So much to detest,

What is ever enough!?

Look for the light,

A tiny light is sufficient to enliven a dying heart

Study your purpose?

Come on, put some emphasis,

Start thinking of the well being of the spirit and soul.

To be superior or inferior?

Humble or arrogant?

Who do you live to impress?

Farm animals?

Society and the string pullers?

The puppeteers?

Come,

Choose a path,

Upon death,

We’ll be answerable,

On the path we stepped.

May our hearts be blessed with vision,

To tread this mission,

A path engaged in submission,

That leads to fulfillment,

One that ends with peace and other attainment.

A Message

Ask anyone...no matter what their beliefs; a believer or an atheist—whatever he is;

If there is one thing a human can be certain about, it is death.

If only we, with genuine interest or with a proper amount of curiosity, take some time and ponder on the eventual, nearing existence called death....will we then be able to think on how little power and control we have over our lives?

Ironically the thought of death never cross our minds...we are fully aware that we are not immortal but it doesn't occur to us that death will come to us sooner or later.

Are we too consumed over life? I know I am.

Though I wished I’d be more consumed with happiness and my mind and heart engaging in serenity and peace. Sadly, that which consumes the mind is often bleak.

Back to the subject, again if we ponder on this matter, it'll lead to us thinking on how precious time is. Especially in today’s world where time seems to be moving faster and faster; it seems there’s even evidence that the world’s rotation too is spinning more and faster than it used to.

 Having said that, even before death if one lives long enough he/she has to entertain the prospect of facing old age; old age also means being prone to sickness and weaknesses.

Everyone at one point of their lives has asked, ‘what is life?’ though sadly that curiosity fades away, in most cases, they say, ‘I've grown up’. Ironically upon reaching adulthood that curiosity diminishes. They have jobs, ambitions and responsibilities. Who has time for these silly questions? Eventually they succumb to an endless cycle of repetition. Enslaving their lives into a poisoned system designed by evil people; entangled in superficiality and shallowness which leads man into worshipping materialism and his life busied and entangled with things that are merely looks and feels good on the surface.

Sadly or should we say fairly enough, he doesn't or will never realize that which he has accomplished will never fill the emptiness in his heart. He will forever be looking to satiate his hunger for a glimpse of peace and he will find numerous ways to escape and he will find them in many forms of escapism's. Alas! Only but for a short moment will he manage to char his mind with expensive intoxicants or deterrents, then he resumes a life that is void of any peacefulness or calmness.

Let’s use this example, we witness every day, those who are wealthier are more prone to proving their prowess, abusing their power and wanting more and more. This is not a trait of a happy or satisfied person; instead it is the characteristic of a deeply troubled and unhappy person who constantly needs to prove his worth to others.

One who worship himself and is a slave to his desires. What can he achieve, when the spirit/soul doesn't recognize currencies or luxuries or anything in physical form?

These days, being selfish, self-centered and narrow minded is so common that it is the norm; it is the accepted way of life for most. We speak of calamities but what is a bigger calamity than a noble human capable of thinking succumbing to the ways that are lower than animals? Mentally corrupt, a being that transgresses and takes advantage of others weaknesses. Worse still the world is controlled by a small group of powerful people puppeteering the lives of the masses.

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I didn't choose to come into existence, still I exist, if I had a choice…though to even to think of having a choice it-self is almost impossible to imagine. I was put into existence hence I exist. Now, ever since I started thinking on the meaning of existing, existence, on life, on the world, etc.. The very significance of being placed in a horrid place such as the earth itself is an indication of how powerless and weak a human is. Though he has been given instructions and been given guides to overcome this earth and its deceitfulness.

I now quote from a book I am reading, “But man is a limited being. His position in the universe is infinitesimally small. The astronomers tell us the farthest star of our solar system, known as millets, is at the distance of several thousand light years from the earth. (The speed of light is one hundred and eighty six thousand miles per second, and a light year is the distance covered by light in one year’s travel). They also tell us that there are millions of suns and solar systems like ours in the universe. Now what is the position of our planet in the vast universe? It cannot be more than a speck. What can the position of man be in this speck? Not even a dot or drop in the ocean! Now this dot or drop is out to explore and unearth the realities, secrets and wonders of the universe. Not only that, he is out to know the Creator as well! Can that be possible? Yes, it is possible only if he is prepared to utilize the spark of light in himself, which when set ablaze, works like a spaceship which carries him far beyond the limits of time and space into the blissful domains of Divine Proximity, Divine Presence and Divine Union. Here man in endowed with divine attributes of power and knowledge, knows the secrets of Creation and is able to see the whole universe as a speck lying before him…”

Excerpt taken from, “Islam & Sufism”.Written by Maulana Wahid BakkashRabbani.

I suppose one really learns about life as he grows. How to deal with people, how and what nature is and how dependent of a creature mankind is, how we are so similar yet so different etc. etc. As one grows up he also learns more about himself and his purpose. Sadly, most people stop at a very low level. Caught up in a race, a trap, debts, expectations etc. etc. he turns into one who believes in a philosophy where one solely lives for himself. Again, unfortunately the majority of people in existence today are of this group, sadder still the people who are in power and who govern us are too from this group, at least the lot of them. I have drifted off from the subject again.

In regards to the groups or level of people, we shall use Kierkegaard’s sphere of existence, it consists of three: the aesthetic/material level followed by the ethical sphere of existence and the religious sphere of existence.  Ask yourself this question, where are you?

For century’s mankind have searched for meaning and a purpose. Let us hope that those who were and who are sincerely seeking the truth, find it and by doing so attain the secrets of life and find peace within.

As for those like me who are still struggling and have their ups and downs—let’s be consistent in our search and never give up. For those who seek for the love of his Creator in sincerity and in humility will never fail. For God is all encompassing-ly Most Merciful, Most Compassionate.

 I end with this phrase, "My God! What kind of fountain is the fountain of love, of which I tasted but one drop and wept a river"

May peace be unto you.

Forever?

An Eternity,

 Perpetuity, endlessness and timelessness,

Can we imagine space without time?

We can never fathom the idea of ‘forever’

What is infinity?

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Though, as we have lived and continue living this life,

Have we ever entertained the thought?

That we could be dead at any time?

We think we live eternally,

Our desires insatiable,

We keep desiring and longing,

Hoarding and getting bored,

Nothing is ever pleasing,

 That much is true?

Some say, the reason we think that way is because,

The soul is eternal,

Hence the mind never thinks of dying;

We don’t think that we could die,

Though ironically,

The concept of ‘forever’,

Is something irrational,

Though we continue living,

Never thinking of our departure,

Thinking we will live on forever.

Surat Al-`Aşr

By (the Token of) Time (through the ages)

Verily Man is in loss,

Except such as (those who) have Faith,

and do righteous deeds, and (join together) in the mutual teaching of Truth,

and of Patience and Constancy.

Al-Layl

By the night as it envelops;

And by the day as it appears in brightness;

And by Him Who created male and female;

Certainly, your efforts and deeds are diverse (different in aims and purposes);

As for him who gives (in charity) and keeps his duty to Allah and fears Him,

And believes in Al-Husna.

We will make smooth for him the path of ease (goodness).

But he who is greedy miser and thinks himself self-sufficient.

And gives the lie to Al-Husna;

We will make smooth for him the path for evil;

And what will his wealth benefit him when he goes down (in destruction).

Truly! Ours it is (to give) guidance,

And truly, unto Us (belong) the last (Hereafter) and the first (this world).

Therefore I have warned you of a Fire blazing fiercely (Hell);

None shall enter it save the most wretched,

Who denies and turns away.

And Al-Muttaqun (the pious and righteous) will be far removed from it (Hell).

He who spends his wealth for increase in self-purification,

And have in his mind no favor from anyone for which a reward is expected in return,

Except only the desire to seek the Countenance of his Lord, the Most High;

He surely will be pleased (when he will enter Paradise).

Servitude

The poor servant,

Strives to grasp wisdom

But he has not enough intelligence and experiences

To reach a state,

When even during calamities

The heart stays in peace and ensues calmness

Though in his current state;

Even during stillness,

He feels uneasiness, guilt, pain and all sorts of aching

They say, his heart is empty,

It has not known sincerity and doesn’t know the meaning of piety

What a pity,

Sad, poor and empty!

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The poor servant an upshot/consequence of a cruel society

In an environment where people are judged by merchandises and appearances

The more wealth the more respect, friends and wives

At times he questions his luck,

Though he is reminded, everything is fated

He needs to learn more about gratitude

Every night he goes to sleep a servant,

Who is humbled with destitute,

In many ways he is better than he who goes to sleep

Thinking he’s self sufficient,

Bragging about existentialism,

On how he created his own kingdom,

Where he is always praised,

Yet he lives in a daze.

The poor servant too,

Dreams of a kingdom,

An environment inhabited by the wise filled with wisdom,

Where love in turn becomes predominant,

A transcendental realm in which the air itself is peace,

In which each wishes for the other to be in ease.

Hub

I keep pressing the esc button on my keyboard. Hoping that there’ll be some sort of a relief or release from the several cages of confinement that pains the soul. Though all that happens, happens for a reason…there is no more water in this detention. A country rich with water is having water crisis. A country that was known for its green is now polluted; the air we breathe is congested. So much I wanted to pour out my expressions but there hasn’t been any rain pour.  What could it be, what will tomorrow bring while I am busy sheeping, while I am lying on the bed sleeping? Daydreaming about amazing things because in real life, well you are not in amazement; Rather it feels like being in a maze with too many limitations placed onto you.  Despite all the whineries (whining) I need to be reminded that love is the remedy. In times of pain and difficulties, we put front our complaints to the most compassionate, the most merciful…

Kind One

Oh kind one,

What are you doing?

Where are you going?

What is it that you’re longing for?

Have you not considered your true feelings?

Do you not sense the pain in these probing?

Over and over he planted the seedlings,

Kept planting, watering and delicately nurturing,

Despite the unpredictability and the roughness in the air,

The weather unusual and unstable in behavior,

Sometimes it gets unusually cold,

Sometimes it gets intensely hot,

In worse times we are tested with severe haze,

That is both smoky and suffocating indeed.

Oh you, delicate one,

What are you doing?

Where are you going?

Will you not consider your true feelings?

Even in the torturous heat, he continues fostering,

Taking care of the plants feeling,

Even when they seem to be ignoring,

Even when they seem unmindful to his tending,

Hoping that eventually flowers will start blooming,

Thinking of a peaceful evening

Where the plants are cool and give off clean air,

Where the water flows in it’s naturally stream,

Imagining spring,

Where we settle and bask with contentment and ease,

So everyday he gambles, fighting against his lowly stature,

Though clueless of what tomorrow might bring,

The lowly farmer, enlivening the harsh grounds,

Even when luck is not on his side,

He keeps trying whilst withstanding the pain,

So that none can ask him,

“Why didn’t you keep trying?”

The rest depends on the Praised one,

The One who gives life and death to everyone

Have a little...

The whisperings, the insinuating, in a dark room blessed with a hint of silence, though it keeps speaking, evoking, advocating, that is the curse of being a human being, though the soul that is strengthen by his own calling, protects him from all the conniving brought by the whisperings that constantly tries to weaken him. The battle ensuing, as long as his heart is firm in believing, it won’t be easy to fool him. Though a fool himself, a fool too can be granted with profound intelligence and wisdom; One that sees through from within and through his therein.

Oh you who love, don’t you see that he does not intent to leave you behind? Open up your mind, why think with logic when life itself has no logic? In matters such as this, a rationale mind will only quiver in embarrassment for failing to digest what the heart is unrelentingly, persistently in insisting. Why not Do both? Have faith and have intelligence/logic, though know that you have just a little of both. Just a little of both... Verily what can a human do on his own?, when his senses are unreliable and his mode of thinking changes as certain as how the tides in the seas changes, When even the slightest change in the air can suffocate him to death, when even a few drops of liquid can lead him to his end—what are you so sure of, when tomorrow what it brings, we don’t know of? Have a little more faith and a little more faith and a little more. What are you so afraid of? Won’t you have a loving company that will embrace you and erase you fears...so what you are afraid of?

The dark room, now well lit, he is able to see many things that he wasn’t able to. His whisperings now reduced to weak whimpering, for evil can’t penetrate a protected being, when the heart is filled with love for the architect who created all things, to what avail will the plotting of the creations affect him? Have a little faith and a little more faith perhaps a leap of faith. Why? For what good is worshipping the own mind and putting trust in a weak and constantly changing mind? One who knows his mind, will admit how fickle, inconsistent, erratic, indecisive, unreliable and changeable the mind is. So know yourself, oh you who love, have faith. Silence the whisperings, incorporate peace in the heart by supplementing love for the Creator in your heart.

With Cherry On Top

Nice. Niceness an epidemic, a widespread endemic affecting the whole of mankind,giving birth to an origin of people who thrive on kindness; Propagandas and conspiracies no more prevalent,  rekindling and returning the world to an age of sincerity, where people live together in harmony.

Have you something positive like strawberries? The blue sky, the sun that shines, the birth of a child, a little bird drawing nectar from a flower, the pleasant scent that emits from a flower tree, a warm fire, a really good sleep, mountains that are filled with trees and wild blooms, former enemies giving in and becoming friendly, the seas are free of rubbish and contaminants, the minds of man overly- zealous  with the love of nature, no more petty disputes sparked by jealousy, pleasantries’ akin to      a bird chirping joyously atop of a fruit tree. The end of poverty, no more judgmental incendiaries, Hope, happy families, happiness and world peace, no more greed, all minds and hearts…in ease.  

Where are you going?

When the troubled mind has been engulfed with stressors and anxieties, the diseased heart suddenly begins to speak in a tone which brings about thoughts that spew negativities. It says things that no one needs; an uninvited guest that creeps in unnoticed. A mouthpiece that wouldn't leave one in peace, it comes up with outrageous speeches one that won’t stop whispering into man’s heart, one that would eventually grant way to a malicious path. The world exponentially getting sicker and bleaker, mankind in a state of constant bicker, one that consumes the soul of the weaker—when man has forgotten his Maker he turns into a forlorn creature. Nay! I shall not be consumed by the world’s abuse of power. What a strange start to the New Year, the weather has turned cold while every morning I shiver yet the blessings of the rain are yet to fall unto the grounds. What are you doing? To where are you heading? Things are changing; signs are showing; still we remain consumed with the smaller picture. Lo! Let it be not the day we open our eyes—is the day the soul exits the body.

My-My

Oh my! Here I am again at this juncture, ruptured,

The organ torn asunder,

Hey! However, it hasn't surrendered

Fuming by the hands that torched it

Though the water cools it

I have a bad strain at the back of my neck; one would say most certainly it is caused by stress. 

Oh my! The deprivation of sleep is haunting my thoughts and making me more and more insecure

Oh my! Didn’t I safeguard myself from dropping flat on my face again?

My-my one can never be too sure, can we?

Lost and wandering, the vagabond still in a state of seeking

Seeking serenity, 

he goes through trials and thorns and faces things that pierces his entirety

Still! He embarks on a journey to find the truth hidden,

He travels carefully and in a state of pain and fear,

Unsure of what else might transcend…

Oh my!

p.s. I almost forgot, Happy New Year!

Komuniti

Apakah pernah kita sedari sebelum ini? Seiring dengan jutaan manusia lain kita berlari2 dan berekejaran di atas jalan raya pada waktu-waktu yang ditentukan oleh koperasi-koperasi yang bertuhankan diri sendiri didokong naik oleh pangkat kemuliaan yang dianugerahkan oleh manusia-manusia ‘mulia’ yang lain. Setiap pagi dan setiap petang kita pergi dan kembali. Tidak bahagia jauh sekali sejahtera. Namun disebalik setiap hati kecil, ia impikan suatu kebahagiaan yang ia merasa kehilanganya. Justeru itu, mampukah ketenangan dikecapi dengan routine seharian dan melalui mengecapi kebendaan?

Hamba-hamba sesama kita pula telah mengkalsifikasi sesama mereka. Mereka hanya bersekongkol dengan orang-orang yang setaraf dengan status mereka di sisi komuniti dan masyarakat yang berpandukan fahaman barat yang menilai orang dari aspek luaran.

 Mereka ini adalah orang-orang kebanyakkan yang sudah sebati dengan kehidupan dunia seperti mana kambing biri-biri yang dikawal dan diherdik oleh seorang pengembala yang mengawal hala-tuju mereka. Setiap pagi ia keluar dan setiap petang ia dibawa kembali semula ke kandang-kandang yang mana, ada yang kembali ke kandang yang mewah dan ada yang pulang ke kandang yang disewa. Pengembalanya barangkali boleh jadi hutang-hutang di bank atau keinginan terhadap kekayaan yang tinggi atau yang bertujuan lebih mulia seperti menyara kehidupan etc.

Walaubagaimanapun, tidak jauh di sudut hati setiap hamba ada terdapat suatu kesan kehilangan; kerana sepanjang hidup ini fokus dan konsentrasi hanya diberikan kepada keperluan dan kesejahteraan jasad. Walhal kita adalah suatu makhluk yang berkerohanian. Apabila kecendurungan diberi lebih kepada yang fizikal maka rohani/kebatinan menjadi lemah dan ketenteraman menjadi suatu yang mustahil dikecapi.

Penyakit minda yang diwarisi.

Permasalahan dengan orang-orang tua yang telah deprogram oleh pemikiran barat, ditambah dengan otak yang di ‘brainwash’ hari-hari oleh rancangan-rancangan di TV. Projek pembodohan ini telah mencetuskan pemikiran seseorang itu cendurung kepada kebahagian-kebahagian yang cetek. Apabila orang tua telah berjaya dimanipulasikan, maka anak-anak mereka telah pun dengan mudah dimanipulasi. Jika diperhati inilah keadaan yang sedang dialami oleh masyarakat.

Memang benar, kita boleh mendapat kebahagiaan dari harta-harta di dalam pangkuan kita. Namun itu hanyalah sementara, bahkan mungkin hanya berpanjangan selama beberapa hari sahaja. Seperti satu ilusi yang memberi keseronokan sekelip mata. Sesudah itu mereka beralih mengejar ilusi yang lain.

Ironisnya, seakan jenaka buruk yang mencucuk hati, orang-orang miskin juga bercita-cita untuk menjadi orang-orang kaya yang menzalimi mereka. Kononya mereka akan dihormati dan disanjung. Ingatlah, jika benar sekali pon mereka dihormati, mereka hanya dihormati selama mana mereke mempunyai kuasa. Mereka tidak dihormati kerana akhlak atau karektor yang baik. Mana ada orang-orang kenamaan ini yang fahami akan erti ikhlas atau merendah diri?

Semua orang ingin kaya dunia, tetapi berapa ramai yang mempunyai keinginan untuk mengkayakan dalamanya? Sekiranya seseorang individu itu kaya dengan kerohanian maka dia telah mengenali dirinya dan keinginan-keinginan yang cetek seperti ingin membuktikan diri dan menunjuk-nunjuk kepada masyarakat tidak akan timbul.

Bila agaknya anak-anak muda akan mulai impikan untuk memartabatkan dan memberi kepentingan untuk memperkayakan kerohanian mereka dan bukan nama mereka? Sekiranya itu berlaku, isu-isu seperti hasad dan sifat mementingkan diri sendiri akan berkurangan dan masyarakat akan menjadi lebih makmur dan positif. Walaupun hanya angan-angan, namun ia memberi gambaran yang menarik.

Terdapat seorang nelayan yang mana setelah selesai kerjanya pada waktu pagi, sudah menjadi kebiasaanya untuk berbaring di bawah sebuah pokok yang besar dan rendang. Oleh kerana tabiatnya itu, kelakuanyai telah diperhatikan oleh seorang hartawan yang masyhur yang tinggal di kawasan itu. Suatu hari, kebetulan hartawan itu lalu di tempat berehat si nelayan. Bila sampai di hadapan nelayan yang sedang lena, hartawan itu berhenti dan dengan jelik bertanya, “Wahai manusia, mengapa kamu membuang masa kamu dengan berehat walhal kamu boleh berjaya seperti aku, jika kamu berusaha?” Si nelayan itu bertanya kembali, “Wahai hartawan, mengapakah kamu berusaha dan mengorbankan masa kamu sepanjang hayat walhal kamu sudah pun kaya?” Hartawan itu menjawab, “Supaya bila aku sudah cukup kaya maka bolehla aku bahagia dan berehat sepuas hati aku pada bila-bila masa.” Nelayan itu kemudian menjawab, “Jika begitu, aku sudah pun kecapi apa yang kau inginkan, kerana aku bahagia dengan apa yang aku ada dan selalu berehat sepuas hati ku. ”    

And of the people is he who worships Allah on an edge. If he is touched by good, he is reassured by it; but if he is struck by trial, he turns on his face [to the other direction]. He has lost [this] world and the Hereafter. That is what is the manifest loss. Surah Al-Haj 22.11

The Diamond

I met a diamond in the rough; it was deeply clenched by the hand of a hard rock and had other rock-like stains plastered on it. As soon as my eyes fell onto it my heart too fell for it; for I realized the purity that lies within it, Now engrossed with passion and fuelled by determination, eager I am to sculpt the diamond and make it pure and polish it to its fullest potential. Alas, sadly and unfortunately the stubborn rock that clasped it thought it was the possessor of the diamond and clasped it even more tightly. The rock then said, “you’re not good enough to even lay eyes one the diamond!”  Ignoring the rock’s cry, I tried to get the diamond away from the rock, though every time I do so I get pushed backwards violently by the rock. Now the diamond too is confounded by the rock that has been clenching it ever since it knew life. The diamond now perplexed and uncertain.

Though engulfed by dark clouds and though, weak and poor and unpolished myself;

even without any tools I would use my bare hands to unearth the diamond from the rock. For the diamond deserves to be loved, to be in ease and has the right to breathe the free breeze.  

Now that is odd. I always thought, I’d remain young but without me noticing, through all the sleeping and waking up I am no longer a kid. As I look at my hands pushing against the keys on the keyboard. I am not sure if they’re starting to wrinkle but still I think, I couldn’t possibly age beyond this. Every tomorrow is a day I keep growing; only in this case, I am growing old. I guess it is safe to say no one entertains the possibility of death while he is as ignorant as I am.

End of another year. The breeze moves the leaves gently, they seemed to be designed perfectly as they fluttered beautifully. Conjuring up  a picture of how people are akin to leaves, the branches akin to countries and the tree akin to the world. All three have one thing in common, though their time of death different, all are bound to perish gradually.

Poor

Poor.

Meager, inadequate, hunger, insignificant, weak, destitute, disfavored and unnoticed

Pour not a little love that originates from pure character?

Have you ever known poor?

A child that looks at other children in wonder, smiling helplessly at their grandeurs

Do you know what it means to be poor?

A life that has been decided in the household one was born into

Have you ever been poor?

Disrespected and hated by the closest family members and complete strangers

Do you know what it means to suffer?

When all you feel is fear

Have you known what education is?

Being deprived from it because one’s family was too poor to pay for it

Had you known what is terror?

Being stepped on and constantly feeling threatened

Do you know what life is like for the poor?

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Suddenly in the pitch darkness of the night,

 The morning sun shone bright

It directed its light, causing comfort to reign over the whispering darkness

It spoke; do not fret for as long as the heart is clear, victory is near,

The trees then gently swaying, they said, be patient dear, do not fear, and take refuge in our cover

The blue sky too smiled, it said, what if not temporal, keep steadfast and soon you will be breaking your fast.

So did the vast ocean, serenading with its gentle waves, mesmerizing making his heart feel at ease, till he felt as if he was poor no more.

The ocean then said, should you not then be grateful?
don’t be overcome with sadness and forget your senses.

For this will pass and I will pass and you and everything else will pass

Don’t you know what life is?

Overcoming tests, being a grateful being and in humility attaining wisdom.

Do you know who the poorest are?

Those with too many desires, those who forget what they have while being engrossed in their desires

Do you know who the richest are?

Those who are grateful for what they have.

Vagabond

Like the keyboard is to the computer,

Like the fingers are to the keyboard,

Like the bees are to the flowers,

Like the ant who is infatuated by a particle of sugar,

Like love is to the heart,

One can go on and on with similes, metaphors and figure of speeches,

Akin to a kind heart that enlivens a sore one,

Patience that projects beauty,

Such is the value of the heart I am blessed to save guard,

The vagabond now no longer a vagrant.

Purpose.

To me, this is one of those awkward moments where words and ideas shuts itself from coming out. Though this responsibility-like feeling on not wanting to leave this blog sphere abandoned for too long without any updates compels one to somewhat push the words out rather forcibly but at the same trying to arrange it neatly. The self refuses to speak of itself and closes the curtains from being studied by curious eyes. Yet when an out-pour of expression—of any kind is involved it does give out a thing or two, sometimes even more.  

One minute the sun shines bright, making everyone smile the next minute the sun pushes it and causes man to whimper and as usual whine about the discomfort of the heat that had been produced. One minute the rain falls down like the blessing it is, wets the ground, nourishes the green and creates a creek, a stream, a pond, a bay and a water source to drink from. The next it pours down a storm and causes worry and when it continues pouring no man-made drainage system is able to stop it from flooding.

Man a sensitive creature, it shouldn’t be too hot neither should it be too cold. It shouldn’t be too nice, shouldn’t be too evil; shouldn’t be too this nor too that. He lives his life trying to find what makes him feel the best, yet he dies not knowing that acceptance was always best for him.

Though, when some might dream of bigger things, some dream of better feelings, when some might dream of gaining prestige, some thinks of attaining peace, when some might dream of all the things that society deems, a few would dream of the requirements to attain the purest of love form. When some is able to notice it and see it, most are engulfed by the rat-race, the traffic jams, the chopping down the trees, and the cutting down the mountains and the blatant act of attaining more and more wealth to secure this delusional pretence of security. Verily, if only some could see.

The flower so generous, it livens the mood, brighten the eyes, the trees so compassionate, exhales oxygen, provides shade and yields all kinds of fruits to man, the vegetation’s nutritious, nourishes the man, the river, the sea, the air we breathe…yet man, he destroys the mountains and pollutes the seas, cuts down the trees to give way for posh buildings not meant for no animals nor all people.

So much has he whined about and for so long but to no avail; yet it acts as a reminder to himself, year after year how has his thoughts have changed. When he comes back another year, he might notice some differences in his stand. That being said, he fears he becomes one of those inconsiderate human beings he so vehemently speaks badly about.  L

-ve

The bright morning has turned sour

The sourly orange changes the face sour

Depletion of hope turns the heart sour

The hopeful garden starts to wither

Man has also recovered

Yet the scars

When looked at the reflection of the mirror

Makes a painful reminder

Will the purity of the soil ever recover?

Throngs and throngs of the pessimistic armies appeared

The soldiers’ steadfast and pledged allegiance

To provide anger and lasting malignant thoughts  

One that makes a man eventually shrink into a dried up lifeless form

Optimism where are your grounds?

Positivity, will you come and bond!?

Understanding an Understatement

As the sun fades, I hoped for the heat to give way, better still go away, yet it remained still, I give into sweet cold drinks, they provide the shortest amount of relief, immediately I was angered with this ill fate, like what life has taught, accept and take it in, withstand the pain for your solution lingers in disdain.

After some minutes the heat didn’t seem to be steadfast in torture, I was surprised as to how strongly and committed I felt about my feelings in regards to the heat and now that the heat wasn’t to be felt as much. I was relieved and I began to even feel sleepy. At the same time I was troubled as to how I felt so strongly as if nothing else mattered but the agitating heat I felt—contributed by the surrounding or the weather. Perhaps I should’ve just took a more nonchalant attitude and not be bothered so much. Why was I so bothered when if I wasn’t bothered it wouldn’t have been so bothersome and now I am angry at myself and that is bothersome.

The uncertainty of what tomorrow brings and the threat that it might bring about idleness that brings about darkness and causes the brain to come to a halt and drowns one back into abyss of negativity is surely burdensome to the mind and keeps it busy with a pungent scent of paranoia.

‘The ice cream looks good, but it also causes weight gain.’ This is my thought when I am standing in front of an ice cream box.   

I also worry about the well being of my plants and trees. Not that I care for them too much, I wish to see them blossom healthily with bright leaves and bear sweet flowers and fruits. I don’t know if I am just being selfish.

The darkness of night always majestically taunting, the darkness of night always mesmerizing, the darkness is feared because so little is to be known of it, darkness is revered for the comfort it brings. So little is known of it, what can I expect to know from a black space, just when I close my eyes all that I could see is a black wide space. Though when it is closed the mind then plays this game of confusing one and tricking one into dreams that once again appears significant and realistic, as if it matters. In the end I open my eyes due to the sound of the clock only to realize the life I was so passionate about was nothing but a specter of a dream. This life too will end with me opening my eyes to the light.

I can once again feel the heat returning, the music as soothing as it sounds is not helping, my face appears to be frowning. I don’t know if I can take this feeling nonchalantly.

When my memories go back to the time I was shaped, when my memories go back to when I was a kid, I notice how it was molded and shaped. It was inevitable this fate, though all my thoughts could muster up is unfortunate.

I keep on fretting yet I know I could know of nothing, I keep on worrying, though it might seem like it amounts to nothing, yet worrying keep things flowing. Most of the time it’s just trying and tiring.

It is getting too heated, my body seems like it’s being mistreated, the soul feels like it’s being violated,  it feels like being boiled on the stove where the fire is at its slowest. *goes to shower* Now that I am back from the shower, I feel so much at ease, I feel sleepy once again.

I am the only person who understands myself, yet I understand myself so poorly.